Something's Gotta Give

Source: http://ipcconsultants.blogspot.com/2012/05/somethings-gotta-give.html

As the third part of the Holding On To You series, this post features an interview with a young dental student who is a wife and mother of an adorable two year old son. Nicole (pseudonym) tells of how she manages her multiple roles successfully by being committed to her purpose as a Godly wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend. 

The Mummy Resume: Who are you? What's your elevator pitch?

Nicole: I am a woman trying to figure out my role in life; as a wife, mother, student and person and how I can live the life God has set out for me to live.

The Mummy Resume: Has your definition of yourself fundamentally changed since you became a mom?

Nicole: Yes. I think becoming a mom made me realize that the world does not revolve around me. 

The Mummy Resume: What do you do? What do you enjoy about it? Has your choice of profession eased your role as a mother or made it more challenging?

Nicole: I am studying to become a dentist. I enjoy the satisfaction of being able to treat a patient and get them out of pain or discomfort. I derive the same satisfaction from being a mother as I tend to my son’s needs.

The Mummy Resume: Describe a typical day in your life. What are your secrets to balancing motherhood, school, and life? Any practical tips? 

Nicole: Well, on a typical day, I wake up, brush my teeth, take a shower, have devotion, eat breakfast, leave by 7am, and drive 30 minutes to school. I attend my classes; go to clinic, then drive back home, where I feed my son, have dinner, play with my son, bath my son, study and go to bed. A pretty standard day if you asked me. I really have no secrets. I take it day by day. Some days are great. Others make me wish I had super powers. I do find myself crying out to God to help me, which He does. I also have a wonderful support group including my husband.

I try to take breaks from my routine - I simply enjoy just being home and hanging out with the family. I also tend to play games on my phone during dull moments to take my mind off school.

The Mummy Resume: Wow, definitely some great lessons in there. Taking it day by day is important. Sometimes as mothers, wives, and women chasing a career, or in your case, an education, we function on overwhelmingly long lists of to-dos. Having the wisdom to take it day by day and then finding and relying on a great support system and divine help, certainly makes an otherwise impossible role manageable.

Which brings me to my next question, how have you kept your marriage alive through the exhaustion of balancing it all? 

Nicole: Date nights, praying together, sharing about our days, doing special things for each other to show that we do care. My spouse has encouraged me through the harder times and prayed for me.

The Mummy Resume:  That’s wonderful. I’m sure sharing spiritual beliefs helps ground you too and gives you the common foundation needed to be supportive of each other. You certainly seem like you have got it all together. Do you have any pitfalls? What are they? What things do you still struggle with in balancing motherhood and life? Are there days when things seem to fall apart?

Nicole: Hahaha, I couldn't help but chuckle at your description of me having everything together. Are there days when things seem to fall apart? Certainly! I feel like that is me a lot of the time. I'm not perfect but I do want the best for my family. So every day I try to put them first. That does not always happen but tomorrow is a new day and I just ask God to show me how to be better.

The Mummy Resume: I love your spirit of acceptance. I feel like a lot of the stress we undergo as women is self-imposed because we do not celebrate the small victories and simply accept our limitations. What are those small victories for you? What do you enjoy most about being a mother? Why?

Nicole: This might not make sense but looking into my son's eyes and marveling at the fact that he is my son and that God gave him to me. It's surreal because I feel like a kid myself sometimes. I certainly believe that there is a kid in every one of us…but yes, just coming to the humbling realization that I am privileged to be a mother makes all the struggles and challenges that come with the role so worth it.

The Mummy Resume: What dreams and aspirations do you have for your son and how are you working towards giving him a head start in that direction?

Nicole: I wish that my son grows up to be a man after God's heart. I want him to be fulfilled in whatever vocation he decides to pursue and that God will bless him too with a loving family.

The Mummy Resume: Those are really treasured aspirations for your son and I’m sure the prayers you say today for those wishes to come true will make a great difference several years down the lane. What advice do you have for young moms like yourself aspiring to excel at motherhood while reaching their full potential in other endeavors? 

Nicole: Don't be afraid to ask for help. Also realize that something always gives so you have to be okay with the fact that three more hours at work, will mean three hours less with your child or family but when you are with your family, make every moment count.